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Friday, April 28, 2006

 

Give Me Some Advice---Please!

Sorry for my absence. I have been rather ill. You see-----I have some chronic illnesses. I have been wallowing in self-pity today. I know I shouldn’t----but WTF. I should be happy that I am not terminally ill and just chronically ill. Sometimes I think at least the terminal patients know an end to their pain is in sight. I may sound like I am looking for pity----maybe I am. However, I am asking for advice tonight. Here is my dilemma:
Following are the meds I take daily:

1 injection of slow insulin at night to keep my sugar down
3 injections of insulin --one before each meal
4 injections of some bullshit that is supposed to help my body produce more insulin
1 pill to keep my blood pressure down
1 pill to keep my cholesterol down
1 pill to keep my blood thin
9 pills to keep the ulcerative colitis sores in my colon from bleeding
1 pill to keep me from shitting myself
1 pill to keep me from pissing myself
1 steroid pill to keep me strong
4 vicodins to keep the pain in my back from making me scream
2 pills to keep the neuropathy at bay---just so my feet won’t feel like they are in a vice
1 pill to keep me from drowning in my own stomach acid (which almost happened twice)
1 suppository to enable me to hold down the pills—without it the nausea is unreal

I have a primary care doctor, a gastoroligist, a cardiologist, a pulmonary specialist, an endocrinologist, an urineoligist, an orthopedic specialist, an optometrist, and a dentist who all fight over my money each month. I use two thirds of my month of vacation time seeing these folks. They all want to see me anywhere from one to four times a year. My co-pay is $25.00 on doctor visits and $40.00 on generic prescriptions and $80.00 on non-generic. I can’t go to the drive-in-widow—the meds won’t fit. The pharmacist acts like I’m a meth user when I pick up 300 syringes a month.

I have to pay 20% of each procedure----which there are many.
Over the last three years I have had cameras up my ass and down my throat. I have been cat scanned, MRIed, and had barium squirted up my ass. I have been injected with radioactive iodine. I have been forced to drink chalk and put on a table that literally shook me so my stomach would be coated. I have had my balls fondled and countless doctors have molested me by sticking their greased fingers up my ass.

I have constant severe cramps and the shits. The prednisone makes me eat like a pig while the doctors tell me the extra weight is killing me. My back, my feet, and my legs are in constant pain. I am getting worse----not better.

Monday I was told I was pissing blood. Now they want to stick a tiny camera up the hole in my penis so they can look at my bladder. They will give me a local----but they won’t sedate me. My insurance doesn’t think it necessary.

My question is, when is enough -----------enough? When it is more dignified and humane to stop with the meds and just let nature take its course?

I know there are patients far worse off than I. I am able to work and able to enjoy moments of life. SO----I will take the test. I will suffer the humiliation of wearing the backless gown and having the nurses and the doctor torture my poor penis. I just don’t know how much more of this shit I will choose to endure.

Comments:
OH MY GAWD! AS I READ THIS I AM LAUGHING....But I shouldn't be. The only good thing was the vicodin - cry that you are in pain all the time. Tell 'em you need something stronger percocet works well. Then just be in a stupor. Get well madman. Godspeed. Keep your dick up and try to make jokes when they are sticking the camera up there. I,like the rest of blog world, will be thinking about ya. Oh yea, how bout postin some of those pictures.
 
CULAYTA--all I can do is laugh---it doesn't do any good to cry!
 
Man, I had no idea all of this was going on with you. I wonder how you keep your sense of humor? Take care of your peepee, Madman.
 
I'm praying for ya Madman. A lot.
I was gonna say drop the vicodan for a good daily shot of the ol' hemp cure-all but then I realized that hasn't had a good history with people suffering insulin imbalance, damnitall!
Good luck, get well and god bless.
(this from someone who is mostly an atheist!)
 
I dont' know, the herb is always a good idea...it'll cure whatever ails ya! Or so I'd like to believe...

Seriously, hope you're feeling better soon. After reading that, I won't bitch quite so much about my own situation (to arrive under separate cover).

BE well.
 
Finally someone who knows what its like! I hear ya on all of those points.Ive been sick for a while and Im almost glad to say the end for me isnt too far away. I am at the stage where I cant take anymore but nature has decided to put me out of my misery soon. Dont lose that sense of humour, you'll need it even if its just to annoy everyone else lol

Much Love

Becca
 
Agh! Madman! Who knew?!? Not me!
I'm right there with ya on the gazillion pills business. The nausea one as well. I just did a whole vomit post the other day.
Aside from the Diabetes...have you been diganosed with Crohn's disease?
I had a family member with this disease...took them forever to diagnose it, but once they did...as long as she strictly abided by what they said to eat and didn't eat what they said she shouldn't, she led a pretty, average, active life.
You're in my thoughts...I know how it is to be sick to death of being poked and prodded. Blech.
 
That guy in the brown pyjamas and the oversized gardening tool? Fuck him, he can wait. There's too much fun to be had, questions to be answered, women to chase, fast cars to race, kids to watch grow up, people to teach, racists to slap, porn stars to jerk off to and a million and one other things that people enjoy about life for you to quit now.

Clench your fist Madman, then extend your middle finger and point that symbol of defiance at anyone suggesting that you won't get through this.

Oh and slap some cute nurses around with your dick, you know you want to :D
 
Oh, man, I wish I could help. I had to have that camera up the peehole about a month ago. No sedation or anything. The worst thing was they pawed at my parts forever because it wouldn't go in (small urethra, apparently). Ouch! I know it's worst for guys though because it has further to go in.

You're in my thoughts and prayers. And I'll always have a little crush on you even when you do talk about cameras up your butt and stuff.

;-)
 
oh, madman, i so admire you for laughing & joking as much as you do! and you're totally right...WTF else CAN you do but laugh when life kicks you in the ass?? let yourself lose? uh-uh, no way! & yeah, try percosets, take a break from vic's for awhile.
 
yea I second what Almogo said... very funny guy
 
Have you been tested for Celiac Disease?

My mother had alot of your symptoms for years and was finally tested for Celiac - it was positive.

She altered her diet dramatically and is now doing great.
 
I hope you get diagnosed soon. I don't know what their looking for with that goodness forsaken camera, but they better find something man.

I've had tons of penis tubes stuck up into my bladder so they could pour in some x-ray visible fluid to see if the flaps in the tubes to my kidneys were allowing stuff to backup up from the bladder. The tests required me to be awake, and I got no local pain killer. What do they do nowadays? Give your penis a shot? I can't imagine numb cream doing much good since the pain and discomfort will be inside the dick canal (not in the bladder). A small dick, then the tube will tear things up more; a big dick, then there is more dick to get tored up, so you’re screwed either way there. And try to avoid a boner, that will complicate things. I just wonder what they are looking for in the bladder that they can’t find with one of those tumor searcher gizmo things.

Anyway, I hope things settle back to normal for you soon. And after, you will probably appreciate life more too. In the mean time, keep thinking positive and remember there is no rule that says you can’t still enjoy life while in pain and discomfort. Every second of life is a blessing—pain or not.
 
From one IBD patient to another, my heart goes out to you. I've been there myself. Thankfully, I didn't go through the insulin injections and I'd probably opt to just die in peace. But I definitely know what you mean when you dare think that terminal patients have it better off than us with Chronic diseases. At least they know what's coming, whereas we just continue to suffer for a lifetime with Crohn's and UC.

Hang in there. One day you will look back in amazement and will find yourself trying to convince complete strangers that you were this sick.

I've been through 12 surgeries, numerous tests (all those that you mentioned), tons of medications with all their side effects, long term disability leave from work for 18 months, doctors visits in five different hospitals in three states and two countries. I drive with a disabled sticker, because I cannot walk long distances without pains. I am a proud carrier of four diseases, all of which are considered "silent diseases" - you cannot see anything wrong with me on the outside.

Today, I take a multi vitamin pill. Okay, two a day. That's it.

Your time for remission will come, too, my friend. It always does for us. ALWAYS!
 
I'm sorry to hear your feeling so badly. Hopefully the spring weather will lift your spirits a bit. Ask your Doc for Oxy, that'll lift your spirits a bit for sure!
 
Damn MM, I cannot believe you forgot to mention the absessed tooth. I told you I'd go with you and hold your hand, but you saw that for what it was, a chance to get a cheap, quick look at your tinkie!!
 
Oh, I just thought of something to cheer you up! Atleast BN isn't the one cupping your balls and asking you to cough. Or it could be Cletus tickling your prostate from the inside, see life isn't so bad after all!!
 
me and Mr.G have the same medical plan.
It does seem like way to many pills and injections.
The ex assistants comments made me laugh. I hope they made you laugh, too.
 
Hah! Been there done that! I take 6 needles a day and morphine twice a day not to mention nexium and countless other crap to drive up my insurance costs. If I have a headache I just take a percocet. They keep giving me vicoden by the bucket load but I pass that out to friends and family as it is like taking a tylenol to me.

I got wise and finally had them stop all of those procedures a year ago and have been perfectly happy not knowing all my ailments ever since. And with the extra money I saved from not giving it to doctors I bought a new laptop with. In fact we are taking a vacation next week with the mney that would have gone to the gastro doc had I done all that he suggested. I don't know how he is going to pay for his vacations now. I may just send him a donation just to let him know I am thinking about him. Do you mind if I refer you to him? He's not doing so well financially now that he has lost my business.
 
Well I'll be damned. I never figured you'd be taking so much shit and having such a hard time physically.

Hope things get better. I always enjoy your posts.
 
My step-dad suffered from colitis for twenty years. Bloody shits and steriods and cramps and horrible crap. He went to a local Oriental medicine doctor here in San Diego who put him on herbal stinky-assed tea and changed his diet. Turns out that as long as he avoids dairy his colitis is in remission. Fucking amazing. I'm sorry that you're in such misery. It makes my chronic illness seem like a walk in the park. Oh, and my dad was on steriods, made him gain about 40 pounds which decreased his ability to breathe. Great when you're dying from emphysema, huh?
 
Madman, haven't seen you posting in a while. I hope things haven't gone downhill even further.

Take care!
 
I've got some pity I can spare on you 'cause DAMN that sounds like it sucks. I don't know if I could endure it, I'm suspicious of any medical treatment that doesn't involve beer.
 
I hope you have a good Rx plan.
 
Mad Man, All I can say is that if tragedy breeds comedy, you should write for a living... you would be a gazillionaire.
(I would be right there with you.)
I am so glad that you still have a sense of humor.
 
Hey Blogger, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!
I have adiet home site. It pretty much covers diet home related subjects.
Come and check it out if you get time :-)
Best regards!
 
NOW I DIDNT READ THE WHOLE THINNG BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU THINK THAT THE DOCTERS WANT TO HURT YOU THEY ARE ONLY DOING IT TO HELP I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU HAVE ALOT OF ILLNESSES I HAVE A SICACELL TRAIT HOW EVER YOU SPELL IT BUT I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT YOU CAN ONLY MAKE THE BEST OF LIFE AND IF THEY ARE TRYING TO HELP YOU YOU HAVE TO GO ALONG WITH WHAT THEY ARE SAYING AND DOING CAUSE IF YOU DONT YOU MIGHT DO SOMETHING AND IT MIGHT HURT YOU THEY ARE ONLY TRYINH TO CURE YOU GO ALONG WITH IT AND TAKE THE TEST IF YOU FAIL YOU CAN SAY YOU STUDIED HARD IT IS JUST THAT MY MEMORY ISENT THAT GOOD AFTER MY APPOINTMENT AT THE DOCTERS AND ASK HIM/HER FOR A MAKE UP TEST SO YOU CAN PASS IT
 
HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER AND YOU CAN LIVE THE REST OF YOURLIFE HAPPY WITH OUT ALL OR MOST OF THESE ILLNESSES
 
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